My best bro @Psychopath and I got into a big old discussion about this site, mostly reminiscing about how we had high quality artists back in the mid 2000's. Before things like collabs and sprite movies utterly fucked any chance of getting by on sheer talent alone, and before YouTube became the utter juggernaut it is now. Among one of the discussion points we had, one of them involved the rules and guidelines that was fronted by the site itself.
Now I know that April Fool's was five days ago, but this is the biggest joke I've seen since my surviving the abortion. So let's begin:
"You must be the creator and owner of the content you are submitting."
This is one of the few legitimately good elements that is maintained by the site at any level. Stolen work as I've mentioned is routinely removed after all. Don't worry, it all goes down hill from this point forward.
"Your submission must not be a modified version of someone else's work."
Then I guess all those dub parodies and sprite animations should've been liquidated all that time ago. All of that shit tends to be only composed of others work with a thin veneer of originality. Hell, if you want to get real narrowminded, all of the parodies on here should be taken to the gulag and starved to death.
"Your submission must not auto-redirect to a new site or open pop-ups. If your submission auto-spawns something to boost stats on another site, your account will be deleted and admins for the target site will be notified."
There are three hitches in your plan Tzeentch. The first is that this assumes that the site will not be run by the asshole doing this chicanery; most scams link back to the conman after all. Secondly, this relies us to rely on the staff, who need to be reminded that LPs are not okay and get rid of them for us. The third element is Creed.
"Your submission must not simply be an ad for your site."
The result of this little stipulation basically just made it so that desperate people would just recycle their shit from YT or whatever and pimp it out at the end. That way they can still be lazy.
"Your submission must not be shovelware made to serve ads or promote your site. If you didn't take personal pride and care in the creation of the content, leave it off NG."
This is possibly the biggest crock of shit this site tries to preach at us. Firstly, if that was the case, then you wouldn't be allowing people to just shovel their shit from FurAffinity/DeviantArt or YouTube for more fans/dosh. Secondly, if this statement was true, then the fact that a solid plurality of what's uploaded would not exist. Hell, a lot of the uploaders when questioned on why their six second clip of a stick man throwing a ball that goes around da earth to smack him in the head state hands down they put no effort in their product. Besides, everyone knows this rule got wrecked and broken since 2001.
Foolish Tom. We have utterly buttfucked any chance that this site ever had of being seen seriously. Now get back to pleasing me.
"You may not submit photographic images of naked people engaging in sexual activity."
But we do allow you guys to draw a variety of fetishes that get into levels beyond ordinary sex between two humans. I get that this is due to this place being a media site, but this still makes me laugh considering the type of shit that this site fires out of its ridiculous anus at any time.
"Do not submit illegal photography such as child pornography and bestiality. We WILL contact the FBI!"
"Your submission must not be racist or downright hateful towards specific groups of people."
This of course is why I've seen flashes that portray arabs as bomb crazy religious crazies, even when they're in preschool.
"You may parody existing movie submissions but you must create your own artwork."
Once again, there goes all of the sprite movies. Seriously, it's a rare day when I see anything in a sprite movie that is utterly original. And no, recolors do not count you lazy fucking people.
"Personal attacks towards other Flash authors will result in deletion."
Welp, byebye BBS and PM system, I rarely used either of you.
"Your submission must not be a pointless "demo" or "preview" without any redeeming qualities."
This has been violated so many times that this guideline has a speed dial to the rape crisis hotline. Seriously, I am certain that you will find a demo on this site at least at one point in the day, and these even usually pass too.
"Do not submit movies or games made from public .FLA files (such as tutorials)."
This once again relies on the people being able to note when this is the case, and a clever conman can easily drown base elements in these with their own stuff.
"Do not submit pictures in a slide show format with no interactivity."
This rule is more impotent than a eunuch. I've regularly seen people upload shit they crapped out in Movie Maker for crying out loud. Heck, like the demos, you'll probably see one of these brain spittles on the portal at any point in the day.
"Do not submit copyrighted video clips or photographs that you did not create."
This seems to tie into a lot of assets that flashes use, and I'm fairly certain that like most of these stipulations, they are half followed at best. This can range from dub bits to other components in the flash.
"Do not submit lame entries with the intent to give users "free blam points.""
This is actually kind of a challenge nowadays, considering it takes some real big fuck-ups to get a flash blammed.
"Do not swap out your original entry with something totally different."
Oh hey, I think this one gets followed at times. I've actually seen this occur once. A bright spot in a world of pitch black blood ridden shit.
"Do not re-submit your entry after it has been BLAMMED without making noticeable improvements."
The obvious trick is to use the collective poor memory of the masses to just reupload the same thing during Clock Day. That way, no effort need be expended.
"Your game must not use Angry Birds or Super Mario Bros. characters/sprites. In general you shouldn't be using any sprites you don't own."
Tell that to all of the sprite flashes that get uploaded to this site.
"Make sure your submission has been properly rated."
The last bit of light in this ichor of filth. This has been regularly followed, and for that I am glad, since it makes at least one more element not a total joke.
So gentlemen, women, and those who want to be the opposite of either of them. Or a cat. Whatever, you know who I'm talking to. Now you should get an idea on how broken and useless the guideline system is on this glorious website and why the webzone po-po here is a joke. Feel free to leave comments on how I'm clearly an imbecile due to X,Y,Z and/or about how I'm an awful person who hates everything in life.